unspoken words

fourteen: new blog!

Saturday, October 31, 2009, 10:00 PM

So, I was bored.

Procrastinating actually and decided to made a new blog :O

I just wanted to make a blog to post all my weird little works and random things I make, to share to the world?

Not that they really want to see.

I just felt like sharing.

Aren't I nice? :P

Here's my new blog: peekanix

*nix is my new pen name :D

Over and out,

yibonnie

P.S: FOLLOW ME on my new blog~ :D

I like ~~minions~~ making new friends :P

makes me one step closer to ~~dominating the whole world mwahahaha~~~ to actually having a life ^^

thirteen: fail.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009, 1:52 PM

failure to conquer mathematics, specifically extension one.

after the annihilation of mathematics (2U);

binomials challenged my knowledge

maximum and minimum values defended the finish line.

projectiles tired and confused my thoughts.

2hrs caged me.

all i could do was turn around and refused the confrontation.

at least i know i will never need to face it again.

the battle was over.

good bye mathematics and all it's related topics.

twelve: terminated english

Sunday, October 25, 2009, 6:11 PM

erased belonging

neglected literary, visual techniques

destroyed frankenstein, monster and replicants

burnt hamlet

forgot memories

undid history

exterminated english

rejoiced

'twas the death of english advanced.

eleven: survival

Monday, October 19, 2009, 9:15 PM

'survival of the smartest'

the race has just begun.

HSC210909

ten: . . .

Thursday, October 15, 2009, 10:56 PM

I was going to type a long bentry....

BUT I really can't be bothered to finish my draft...so...

i decied to blog something, just for the sake of blogging.

haha;;

I don't make sense -__-;;

Hsc is less than a week away.

not going to be able to blog for a while.. unless... ;P

it's not like many people are going to read this

Or anyone is anticipating anything from my blog.

i mean, i wouldn't want to listen (or in your case read) my complaints or worries.

it's not like it has anything to do with you. :P

i now leave you with something for you to think about.

* * *

Humans are funny creatures. in a way they're stupid. They're the only ones who find it difficult to express their inner most, true feelings. Animals, express they're 'feelings' without a second thought. If they dislike it, they turn away. When scared they tremble and hide.

I wonder sometimes, if they really are superior mammals after all.

- source: a little piece of yibonnie's mind.

nine: mixed emotions

Thursday, October 8, 2009, 11:48 PM

excited.

nervous.

stressed. (if that's an emotion)

happy.

sad.

All this crammed into one mind. My mind.

I really am not sure what to feel about HSC, or moving on from high school in general.

Maybe it's post-traumatic stress from graduation from year 12.

I'm excited and looking forward to the days after HSC (even though HSC hasn't really begun yet)

But i'm also nervous, knowing that i would have to face the HSC eventually.

Looking back from year 7, when i saw the older years, year 12 and the HSC seemed impossible, so out of reach. Little did i know my high school years flew by, without much ups and downs compared to others. (I'm not sure if that's something to boast about :P)

And now I'm here cramming everything i learnt in the last 2 years for the big exam like those year 12s before me, who i looked up to (literally) in year 7. And thus, i feel stressed.

Happy? Because i finally realised what great friends i have around me :D

And that i'm not closing myself off, like i did before. Wished i opened up earlier though.

Happy that i can communicate with my parents a bit more, and treat them more like friends. Happy that i'm looking forward and not regretting.

I feel sad not just because there a going to be people who i'll never see again from school, whom i'll miss dearly, but because of all the troubles going on with my family at the moment.

I cant help but feel helpless and how precious our memories are when i see my grandpa, who looked after me, taught me most of my Chinese and most importantly would never forget my name that he christened. After various operations and the inevitable effects of ageing, he now suffers a bad case of Alzhiemer's disease. He cant remember most of his grandchildren (including me) and has difficulty walking. Seeing him in such a state, is really painful for both my dad, my grandma and i. I can see my grandma suffering from taking care of him, dealing with his childish tantrums. Because of my grandpa, and the fact that my grandma's sister past away recently, has caused many fights and disagreements between my dad and my grandma. she wants to go overseas, but afraid of leaving my grandpa with my dad, because my grandpa may burden him. no matter how much my grand ma insists of taking my grandpa to a nursing home, temporarily, (although in the near future, living their permanently seems inevitable) my dad refuses. My grandma wont take him overseas because of the bad weather, which may worsen his health. And so as much as i try not to listen, i still hear the screaming. Because of the stubbornness gene, both refuse to give into another. Seeing my family like this, makes me feel so helpless. I cant help but wish for my grandpa to get well ( although the chances are slim) and regain his memories.

This incident has made me reflect upon my treatment to my parents and everyone else. i now know i should treasure every moment of my life, whether big or small because one day, they might be wiped from my mind in a mere few seconds, or few years. The frailty of the human mind and the horrific consequences of ageing... something you cant change or prevent.

make the best of now.

eight: the wannabes and shameless

Monday, October 5, 2009, 11:45 PM

wannabe noun. (plural wannabes)

someone who wishes to be or do something, but lacks the qualifications or talent; an overeager amateur

shameless (comparative more shameless, superlative most shameless)

having no shame; immodest; unable to feel disgrace

Once upon a time, there was a git who belives himself to be a 'high-in-demand' (ie popular with ladies) guy. He had attempt to insult his fiancée who had kept quiet about it, but one little girl had peeped through the window and witnessed such a horrid incident. The little girl ran home and told her mum. That sparked the overflow of rumours and gossip around the village, not only does everyone in the entire village know now, but nearby villager, and very soon the word spread to the King. the king immediately place a reward on the gits head and not long after the git became the most wanted man in all of New England.

Back in the village, after constant opposition, the family of the gut's fiancée had cancelled the engagement. The git, loosing the bet he had with his friends on his marriage, feeling drunk and depressed rocked up to the local pub. Sill sober and eyeing an innocent girl a few tables from him he drifted his way next to her. The young girl, backing away from his sudden approach felt scared and intimidated. Suddenly the git had and outburst of insults towards the girl, leaving the girl in shock and tears. The pub went silent.The young girl still horrified kicked his b***s (if he had any) and ran off. The villagers turned to the git. The git still believing he did nothing wrong, nodded and went back to his seat. The witnesses, processing the situation, began eyeing the git with accusing glared, many of them tensing their fist getting ready to teach that git a lesson. The git, not comprehending the situation at all, kept drinking and even began talking to some of the villagers as if nothing happened. Little did he know, that he was about to get taught a serious lesson.

to be continued.

seven: parents

, 8:24 PM

Have you ever noticed how Asian parents have constant gatherings, rambling to each other how similar (or different, though usually similar) their children are? How they compared their kids whilst the others are listening either to learn or criticise other children's actions? Or how they share their little stories and teach each other how to deal with their children?

After much experience with these types of conversations, i have learnt the best thing is to keep quiet, listen on if you may, but best to ignore most of it. Not that its embarrassing or annoying, but for your sake, it's to not know what you're parents reveal about you, so you keep face. (or at least think you have a few secret with your parents which they don't know ;P)

For those who are concerned of their privacy, (and yes, we do have concerns which may i add are much more complex than romance, work and home which adults presume) for those who are scared, now, to tell anything to their parents. don't fret. They (parents), too know when there's a limit in which they can reveal our private lives to others. though i must stress, next time before you speak to your parent about your most recent hook up or driving experience, i suggest take time and rethink. Be aware about the 'audience' which your story will reach, and try to word it the best way possible, so that it shows you in good light in front of your parents and their peers.

six: race to the finish

Sunday, October 4, 2009, 4:25 PM

hsc is a little more than two weeks away.

(for those who don't know is the REALLY big exams at the end of year which supposedly decide your future and whether or not you can get into university or not:/)

Should be studying, but really bored of it to be honest. When i think of the hours of exams that face me in mid october, i freak out :S

devised an study timetable.

wonder if i'll follow it this time 'round.

Funny how we 'graduated' and celebrated and now we face the biggest exam of our lives.

Our education system is whacked.

i wonder if i'll see my friends after hsc.

people say 94% of the people dont keep in contact with their high school friends unless you do the same course or go to the same univeristy.

makes me scared how we move on and get over things so easily.

It's as if we just rewrite our memories in cycles.

primary school, format, high school, format, university.

odd how a human mind works.

sometimes we get all emotional like those warm fussy feeling and then we can be emotionless like a computer.

human minds are wonders within themselves.

okay, i'm over that nostalgic burst.

Sorry about that, got a bit philosophical near the end.

gone studying.